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Being Healthy, coeliac friendly, Cooking, corn free, dairy free, diabetes, diabetic friendly, gluten free, low carb, nut free

Middle Eastern Chicken and Potato Dupe

Posted on August 17, 2025 by singingaboutcooking

While doom scrolling one night, I came across this recipe video for Middle Eastern Chicken and Potato one pot bake. Mmmm, mm – now that’s my kind of dinner inspiration.

The Things I Like and Will Use

One pot – while the video shows using a pot that is commonly used when starting a meal on the stove and then finishing in the oven, there’s no reason you can’t or shouldn’t use a sheet pan or standard baking dish.

Chicken thighs – bone in with the skin – this is my favorite piece of chicken to cook with. The little extra fat keeps it juicy while cooking and adds that little bit of extra flavor you just can’t get from a chicken breast.

Covered and uncovered cooking. When cooking meat with the bone in, it can be hard to confidently cook it through, so cooking covered – foil or lid – is an excellent way to achieve this. And then the shorter uncovered time is for crisping up the skin so if you are eating that (and you don’t have to), it’s a delightfully crispy crunch.

The Things I’ll Take Inspiration From and Why

Now, I love the idea and all of the individual and collective flavors of this dish, but I find myself on a tighter food budget these days. So here’s how I’m making this work with what’s in my pantry.

Lemon – rather than rely on fresh lemons and their rising cost from tariffs, I keep a bottle of lemon juice in the fridge. It’s controversial with professional chefs, but it’s far more versatile and I don’t have to worry about it going bad or drying out.

And as it happens, I also just bought a ton of Greek lemon infused olive oil, so I’ll also be prepping the baking dish with this lemon oil to contribute to the dish as well.

Tomato paste – I don’t cook anything that uses tomato paste – not even marinara. So I never have this ingredient in the house. What do I have? Ketchup. So tonight, the “sauce” base is ketchup.

Aleppo pepper – that’s a pretty specific spice that’s not part of my pantry, but in the spirit of peppers with and without heat, I have lots of others. For this, I added a squeeze of Sriracha for just a hint of heat and smoked paprika for the smokiness from dried pepper.

Cumin – so I definitely have cumin, but I was feeling more curry, so I switched. That simple – followed what my palate was more interest in.

Carbs – so this dish as shown in the video is pretty high carb and not at all diabetic friendly, so I made some simple additions and one subtraction to balance this out:

removed rice – because rice is my least favorite carb
added quartered onions
added chunks of zucchini

Both the onion and zucchini are highly traditional additions to meals from countries and cultures east of the Mediterranean to the Indian Ocean and to the Pacific.

Side Note on the Term “Middle Eastern”

I’m nearing my 50th birthday as I make this dinner, and I recall a video excerpt I found earlier this week that challenged the terms “middle East” and “far East” as colonial, and therefore, oppressive terms. Yes, I agree, and I wanted to bring your attention to this. You see, the words “middle” and “east” only have meaning when we know the origin point – middle compared to what? east compared to what fixed point. In this case – it’s London – the center of the British colonial empire.

In that paradigm, then, “East” refers to everything east of the Mediterranean to the Pacific ocean, the middle of which is the Arabic and Indian countries and cultures and the “far” of which is the aggregate of the Asian cultures.

I offer these as generalized geographic assignments for the colonial “Middle East”:

Western Asia
Southwest Asia
West Asia and North Africa (WANA)

I offer these as generalized geographic assignments for the colonial “Far East”:

East Asia
Pacific Asia
Northeast Asia – Korea, Japan, northern China
Southeast Asia – Vietnam, Thailand, Indonesia

I offer these as generalized geographic assignments for the colonial “Indian subcontinent”:

South Asia
The subcontinent

I offer these as generalized geographic assignments for Arabic-speaking regions

Arab world or Arab states
North Africa and Arabian Peninsula

These alternatives focus on the geography relative to the region itself rather that in comparison with a conquering or colonial empire center.

One of the obvious challenges to Westerners is that our sense of world geography is likely to confound most in correcting our terminology. Beyond that, these terms have been assigned cultural meaning as well that may not align with the geographic/continental mapping, where a term like “Middle Eastern” is generalize to Arabic speaking countries regardless of their geographic location, and likewise “Far East” to a reductive understanding of Asian to refer to those of Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Vietnamese, Korea, and Indonesian descent.

This discussion deserves far more exploration, so thank you for not skimming just to get to more details about the recipe.

The Ingredients

In the recommended order of preparing (to make it easy to assemble):

8 tiny golden creamer potatoes, quartered (or 4 medium or 2 large)
3-4 small yellow or white onions, peeled and quartered
2 medium zucchinis, cut into 1-inch thick “slices” or round chunks
1/2 cup ketchup (or the tomato and pepper paste combo from the original recipe)
1/2 lemon juice (bottle or fresh squeezed)
1T Sriracha (or 1T Aleppo pepper from the original recipe)
1T curry (or cumin from the original recipe)
1T garlic powder (or 4-5 fresh cloves minced)
1T oregano
2t salt
1t pepper
4-6 chicken thighs, bone in with skin (or breasts or leg quarters)

The Assembly Process

Here’s how to layer it all into your baking dish.

Step 1: wash and chop your potatoes, onion, and zucchini. Drop them all into a greased baking dish, ideally into a single layer. They’ll be squished together, which is good.

potatoes, onions, and zucchini - large cut and mixed in the bottom of the baking dish

Step 2: in a measuring cup or other vessel with a pour spout, add your wet and spice ingredients and then mix well with a whisk or fork.

sauce ingredients collected and started in the measuring cup with pour spout

Step 3: pour about half of the sauce over the veggies. Use a spoon or tongs to toss the veggies in the sauce to coat all sides.

Step 4: place your chicken on top.

Step 5: pour most of the remaining sauce and use your hand(s) to quickly coat the entire chicken thigh – not just the top. Pour any remaining sauce on top of the chicken.

use all of the sauce - half on the veggies first and the remaining amount on the chicken placed on top of the veggies in the backing dish

The Cooking Process

Step 1: preheat the oven to 400 degrees Farenheit. NOTE: I do not wait for the oven to fully preheat to put in the dish; my oven rarely takes more than 7-8 minutes total to preheat, so the difference is negligible for such a long-baking dish.

Step 2: cover the baking dish with foil, wrapping the edges snuggly around the end handles.

foil sealed baking dish placed on the lowest oven rack (closest to the baking heating element)

Step 3: bake for 45 minutes with the foil on and on the lowest rack, closest to the baking element (usually at the bottom of the oven).

Step 4: slide out the oven rack and remove the foil lid.

Step 5: push the oven rack back in and set the timer for another 15 minutes. This is an essential step for cooking the skin to be pleasant to eat and ensure the meat is fully cooked.

Step 6: take out of the oven and let rest for 10-15 minutes to cool enough to eat without burning fingers and tongues.

Enjoy!

Being Healthy, coeliac friendly, Cooking, dairy free, diabetes, diabetic friendly, gluten free, low carb, vegan

Lasagna – Gluten Free, Dairy Free, Nightshade Free, Accidentally Vegan

Posted on July 14, 2024 by singingaboutcooking

I’ve been craving lasagna, but anything Italian is really hard when your food allergies/intolerances hit all three major Italian points: pasta, cheese, and tomatoes. I mean, c’mon, it’s their flag, for crying out loud.

Gluten-free Lasagna Noodles

Gluten free pasta is easy as long as you have some kind of access to the Italian made stuff – and thank Amazon, I do! These gluten free, egg free, no cook lasagna noodles are perfect. In fact, one box makes two 9×9 lasagnas for the single person (or maybe 2-person family). Highly recommend, but you do you.

Buy on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00HRJNNSS/ref=ox_sc_act_title_3?smid=A3MXLTRINUPWUY&psc=1

Tomato-free Sauce

This piece of the puzzle has taken me the longest to figure out because all of the “red” vegetables are nightshades, and that’s specifically what I need to avoid – no tomatoes, no peppers. And it finally hit me – ratatouille sauce: roast down what’s currently in season and then blend into a sauce.

What I made today is

1 zucchini
2 carrots
1 whole pod of garlic
1 package of frozen riced cauliflower
2 cups homemade vegetable stock
2T Badia Italian Seasoning
1t salt
1t pepper (I like a little kick)
2T cooking oil of your choice (I like grapeseed oil)

Roast the zucchini, carrots, and garlic at 350 for 45 minutes. While those are roasting, dump the frozen riced cauliflower in a sauce pan with 1 cup of the veggie stock and heat on low, mainly to thaw the cauliflower; you don’t need to “cook” anything.

When the roasting veggies are done, add them to the sauce pan and blend with an immersion blender. Add more veggie stock as needed to get to your desired thick or thinness.

Set aside until ready to assemble.

Dairy-free Ricotta Filling

In the absence of any options for dairy-free ricotta in any market (brick-and-mortar or online), I turn to tofu, which is my go-to for replacing “creamy” ingredients. Normally for this I use silken tofu as it’s already in a soft, silky, creamy state. But I only had extra firm tofu today to make this recipe, so here’s how I turned it into even better faux ricotta than when I use silken: crumble it up well with your fingers, add about 1 cup of liquid (I used my homemade veggie stock), and blend with an immersion blender (secret weapon of this recipe, IMO). Then I add my “regular” mixins:

1 cup shredded zucchini
1 package of sliced mushrooms – sauteed until golden brown
1/2 medium white onion, finely diced (about 2/3 cup) – sauteed with the mushroom until translucent
3 cloves garlic, finely minced
1T Badia Italian Seasoning blend – you do you
1/2t salt
1/4t pepper

I forgot to take the mise en place photo before I dumped the zucchini and spices into the tofu ricotta.

Cook the mushrooms by themselves in the same pan you roasted the ratatouille veggies in – no extra oil is needed. Once the mushrooms have browned and the water they released evaporated, move them all to the outer edge of the pan and drop in the onions. Sautee maybe 2-3 minutes more until the onions are less white and moving towards clear-ish. Scoop it all into a bowl to cool for just a minute before mixing into the tofu ricotta.

Mix well in a bowl and set aside until ready to layer.

One of my favorite things about tofu as opposed to soy is that tofu is high protein with almost no carbs; soy is just the opposite – mostly carb with a modest amount of protein much lower than the carb load.

Let’s Assemble

There’s no wrong way to layer lasagna, but I have a few things I like to do to ensure the no-cook noodles are given the best shot at success:

Start with sauce on the bottom of the pan before you put in noodle sheets
Top each layer with sauce so the noodles are always being set into sauce

When you do this, you ensure that there is always liquid surrounding the noodles during cooking so that they come out lovely and fully cooked like pasta should be.

Otherwise, the tip is to be patient, and to press the thicker layer instead of “spreading” them.

Final Bake

Once you’ve got all your layers done, bake at 350 for 35 minutes. If you are using any cheese on top of yours – regular or dairy free – I recommend adding at the 30-minute mark and baking for about 10 more minutes (longer if you like your cheese browned and crunchy).

Being Healthy, coeliac friendly, Cooking, dairy free, diabetes, diabetic friendly, gluten free, low carb, nut free, soy free

Chicken, Zucchini, and Corn Burgers

Posted on July 14, 2024 by singingaboutcooking

I’ve been craving zucchini fritters and corn fritters and have been on a ground chicken kick, so when I came across this recipe for Chicken, Zucchini, and Corn Burgers from The Cafe Sucre Farine, the ingredients when on the shopping list!

And if you’ve followed me for any length of time, you know I had to make a couple of modifications due to food allergies – though thankfully not huge changes:

red peppers (nightshades) are replaced by chopped frozen spinach
panko (gluten) is replaced by chickpea flour

Check out how this recipe when for me.

Mise en Place

I’ve been taking an online cooking course in gluten-free and dairy-free cooking, and the first lesson isn’t in cooking itself but in the philosophy of mise en place – preparing all of your raw ingredients so that once you begin with assembly, you won’t have to stop or worry about missing something as you move efficiently through the cooking process. So that’s how I started here since it’s all raw ingredients, mixing and shaping, and then cooking.

1 lb ground chicken
1 cob of corn, kernels sliced off
1 cup shredded and drained zucchini
1/2 cup frozen chopped spinach
4 green onions, sliced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 egg, beaten
4-6T chickpea flour
2T cilantro
1T cuminn
1T salt
1/2T pepper

Mix with Your Hands

Both sides of my family – the country cooks and the city cooks – have a hands-on approach to cooking. Pretty much any time ground meat is mixed, we use our hands. And this is no exception, especially since I choose to form the burgers and place them on a cookie sheet to bake rather than cook in a skillet.

I was making these for lunches for the week, so I made five “regular” sized burgers, like I would want on a bun if I chose to eat them that way. The original recipe also suggests making more, smaller patties to dip as an appetizer.

With replacing the panko with chickpea flour instead of gluten free break crumbs or panko, the mixture remains a bit more wet since there’s not as much carbohydrate to soak up the moisture from the egg, vegetables, and chicken.

I chose to go with the chickpea flour because I wanted more nutritional value than any bread crumb or panko – regular or gluten free – provides while achieving similar results. I also like keeping the moisture available during the cooking process so that the resulting burgers are still juicy.

Meal Prep

And that’s how meal prep is done for this week. These protein- and vitamin-packed burgers will accompany my gluten-free, dairy-free, nightshade-free lasagna for lunch at work.

Business Articles, Small Business Tips

6 Truths about Getting into Real Estate

Posted on August 27, 2022August 27, 2022 by singingaboutcooking

When you hear the dollar amount of commissions and see real estate agents post about working from tropical islands, it can seem like a no-brainer to get your license and join up. STOP – and consider some realities before you take that leap.

For the past five years, I’ve been the backbone of the business end of real estate – first for a small team owned by a long-time salesman and then as the business manager for large, multi-location brokerages and now supporting over 825+ franchised brokerages through the corporate team. And here’s what I’ve learned are the top myths folks still believe about becoming a real estate agent:

Get your license and sell a home the next day.
You can set your own hours.
Net $1M in your first year.
The commission split is the most important number.
Training is free from the brokerage.
Everything is a contract!

1. Get your license and sell a home the next day.

How long it takes to “get started” varies, and lot of it depends on YOU. The rest of the timing is up to the government on the front end.

One of two sequences are going to affect your ability to take a buyers agency or listing right away after passing your exam:

In some states, you have to received your license from the state real estate commission before you can affiliate with a brokerage, and you must be affiliated with a brokerage *before* taking an agency – legally.
In the other states, you have to affiliate with a brokerage *before* you can apply for your license.

Either way, you must have BOTH license in hand AND brokerage affiliation *before* you can sign a buyer or take a listing. The wait time for this can be 2 days to 2 months, largely depending on the real estate commission’s process.

Pro Tip: ask the brokerages you are interviewing with how long it takes for you to have both to be able to have business on the books.

The other side of this is that signing the buyer and taking the listing are just the beginning. For listings, expect a 45-60 day process from list to close – that’s 45-60 days before you get paid. For buyers, expect 30 days of showings and offers before you finally get one accepted, and then 45-60 days to close.

Assuming you’ve gone into real estate full time (quit your day job and work on real estate 8-10 hours a day), that’s 2-3 months of your personal savings you are spending. Did you save that much yet?

Pro Tip: save at least 6 months of your personal expense needs before quitting your day job. This will get you through those first 2-3 months before your first closing and commission income check.

2. You can set your own hours.

Yep, you sure can. And If you know anything about how many hours business owners put in a week, then you know this means 60-80-hour weeks to get your new business off the ground.

You see, when you become a real estate agent, you become a busiess owner, which means that in addition to writing offers, overseeing inspections, and collecting commission checks, you are also responsible for

creating marketing and advertising – you are a graphic designer, a copy writer, and digital and social media presence
keeping the books – you are a bookkeeper, budgeter, and – if you hire an assistant – a payroll payer
human resources – as your business grows, you may hire an assistant, a showing assistant, another agent to help you – you are an interviewer, employee/contractor paperwork, tax paperwork, trainer, manager, performance reviewer, and firer.
and more.

Are you ready to take on these roles and more as your busines grows? Where will you find the hours to perform the non-sales parts of running your business? Or whom will you pay to do these for you? Does the brokerage you are talking to offer support and training for YOU to become this business owner?

Pro Tip: you will spend either time or money – choose wisely – real estate is expensive either way.

With either choice, here are some expectations you need to keep in mind:

A real estate agent is a business owner, not just a sales person. You have to also order supplies, become a marketing expert, enter your business receipts into an accounting program, file business taxes at the end of the year. That’s a lot to learn in addition to the sales and legal ins and outs of real estate.
A full-time job is an 8-hour-a-day job, so if you are dual career, that means you are giving at least 16 hours a day to work.
When you do real estate only 2 hours an evening after your day job, you are quadrupling the time it will take you to simply replace your current income with real estate. So if a brokerage tells you that you can net $100K in one year, expect it to take your 4 years to achieve that working only 25% of the day.

The fact is that business owners get to choose their own hours only when the’ve put in the work and hours to be able to hire others to run their business for them.

3. Net $1Million in your first year

Yes, it’s possible. Nope, it’s not probable.

The key factors in achieving this particular expectation *in your first year* are almost completely out of your control because it’s a function of the local average sales price. Let’s do a little math here:

The average newly licensed full time realtor will close 8-10 deals in their first 12 months.

ProTip: The Millionaire Real Estate Agent (book) digs into this formula and the KW Business Planning Clinic drills down to how many people you need to talk to each day to achieve whatever your Net goal is.

“Net” means the amount you keep in your bank account after splits to the brokerage and all business expenses are paid.

The basic formula for Net is 30-30-40 where 40% is the net you are looking for:

Commission Income (100%) = $2,500,000
COS (30%) = $750,000
Business Expenses (30%) = $750,000
Net (40%) = $1,000,000 (before taxes)

So at 8-12 deals in an average first year in real estate, the average sales price you need to be handling to net $1M a year is around $7Million per contract.

So is this your local average sales price, your experience level, or your luxury designation? Who in your brokerage closed 8-12 deals at $7Million each – that’s wh you need to become your mentor.

4. The commission split is the most important number.

When you are interviewing brokerages – and, yes, YOU are interviewing THEM because they need your money to operate – you’re likely to hear variations on these five costs:

Commission Split
Cap
Royalty or franchise fee
Dues
Transaction Fee

The Commission Split is where folks tend to focus, and everyone wants to hear 100%. Well, here’s the fact: the brokerage has to make it’s money somewhere to provide you with whatever perks they are promising you to get you to sign up. The commission split is where that happens. Here’s what you might expect based on how much real estate business you’ve done in the last 12 months:

Newly licensed agents should expect a split from 50/50 to 70/30 to account for the extra attention from the broker or coach to ensure all actions are legally compliant.
Agents with a history of capping in the last 12 months should expect a split of 80/20.
Agents with a history of achieving $10M+ in sales annually in the local market for at least 2-3 years running may expect a split of 90/10 or 95/5 depending on their production levels. This is the group with the most split negotiating power.

Pro Tip: the commission split determines how quickly you will reach your cap, not how much you’ll be paying the brokerage, so you really want to check out the next paragraph.

The Cap is the real key to how much you are (or aren’t) paying to the brokerage. Here’s how a cap works: based on the month you started, that’s your cap “anniversary” and the beginning of your 12-month period for your cap. The brokerage sets a fixed amount of the cap, let’s say $15,000. Using the split percentage, you will pay only $15,000 of your commission in that 12-month period to the brokerage; once you’ve paid that $15K, you’ll switch to a 100% commission until you hit that anniversary month.

Another way to think of this is that you are worth $15,000 to the brokerage. And in a brokerage with a great culture, every agent, no matter how much business they do, is worth the same – no one is worth more/less than anyone else. Look for this kind of equity in your brokerage because if they are offering you a sweet deal off the spec sheet, then chances are down the road, they’ll automatically update you to the standard cap regular terms so that they can offer someone more valuable to them a sweet deal too.

The Royalty is a cost unique to franchised brokerages like Keller Williams, Berkshire Hathaway, and others. It’s generally 5-10% of your commission, depending on the brokerage. But here’s the kicker and what you want to be really specific in asking about: is the royalty capped or is it assessed on every transaction until the end of time. The answer that best benefits your way to achieving that $1M net is a capped royalty.

The Dues and the Transaction Fees are opposite sides of the same coin. You’ll pay one or both, regardless of the brokerage you choose, so, again, ask lots of questions so that you can accurately compare what you’ll owe monthly, per transaction, or both combined. Here are some common items that fall into these categories:

E&O insurance fees
Lead fees
Broker fees
MLS fees
In-house Transaction Coordinator fees
Training fees
Coaching fees
Desk/Office rental space
Copies and Faxes

5. Training is free from the brokerage.

Pro Tip: you know what they say about free stuff, right? You get what you pay for.

That’s largely true when training is left up to “more experienced” agents to share what works for them – with no compensation. That’s called mentoring, not training.

What you are looking for in training is

a consistent program with clear objectives,
instructions, examples, and practice towards achieving those objectives,
instructors who are trained to be instructors and held accountable for ensuring associates achieve the practice objectives in “class” so they can achieve them in real life, and
a clear habit of scheduling core training progrms on a regular basis (ask for the last three months of the training caledar).

In an ideal world, you’re looking for a brokerage that offers more training opportunities than you could possibly attend in one month and still run your business, training like this for all levels of development, not just for brand new agents and not necessarily just for free:

free training and paid coaching options for new associates – there’s a lot of financial benefit to joining a coaching program that takes a little higher split and offers services you’d otherwise be figuring out on your own like marketing and closing coordination
ongoing coaching – look at options where the coaching fee is at least in part based on what you close rather than a flat rate – that way you know that their compensation is based on how well they help you get more/enhanced business

And be sure to engage in specialized training that might involve travel, including the national convention(s) of the brokerage you join. These are important opportunities to meet and mastermind and learn from the highest achievers in real estate towards improving your business. And they are amazing events for enhancing your referral network, another great way to grow your business.

6. Everything is a contract.

As you are looking for your first brokerage, you are probably taking or just finishing your pre-licensing classes which throw a lot of legal stuff at you – the stuff that needs to make it into a contract or an addendum to a contract for sale to close.

Pro Tip: everything is a contract, and it’s your job to protect your business interests by insisting on having it in writing.

And it’s important that you also know that every part of your affiliation with a brokerage is a contract as well. Start with the brokerage policies & guidelines and your affiliation contract; these are where you should expect standard terms to be clearly defined.

Here are some things you’ll want to make sure you have in writing with signatures for your own protection:

ICA – independent contractor agreement – you are a 1099 contractor of the brokerage, not an employee – make sure you research what that means
All fees you are charged both/either as monthly dues or per transaction fees
Referrals – make sure you have all client referrals you receive and that you send to other agents – even in your own brokerage – in writing and acknowledged by the brokerage that will be handling the commission
Special terms – if you negotiated anything different from the standard affiliation terms, get that in writing – reduced cap, higher split, brokerage-paid services, etc., and especially how long each change is effective. If there’s going to be an end date, you want to know that up front.

Everything is a contract, and it’s your job to protect your business interests by insisting on having it in writing.

Full Disclosure

I currently work for Keller Williams Realty International – the corporate headquarters – and have been affiliated with KW for five years through five different brokerages (called market centers within KW) on the East Coast. I have only worked with the Keller Williams real estate franchise to date and have assisted a number of agents – both newly licensed and with decades of experience – work through the data presented by different brokerages in order to figure out the apples to apples comparison. KW usually but does not always come out on top when weighed against their needs and goals.

Cooking, corn free, gluten free, nut free, soy free

The Secrets to Perfect Every Time Homemade Caramel Sauce

Posted on August 27, 2022October 16, 2022 by singingaboutcooking

When corn and all of its derivatives became persona non grata (food allergy) in my family, we had to go searching for the old homemade recipes from before WW1, when corn syrup made its debut into home pantries as an inexpensive alternative to sugar.

And – gratefully – I found among our family recipes “Bon’s Burnt Sugar Sauce.” Aunt Bon was my grandfather Joe Jones’s oldest sister Yvonne, whom the family nicknamed Bon. And she was my mom’s favorite candy-making expert. We also use her divinity and whipped fudge recipes at the holidays.

The good news: homemade caramel, whether you are making sauce or candy chews, is a really quick recipe – about 3 minutes to measure out the three ingredients to be ready, about 10 minutes from dry sugar to completed sauce, and another minute to pour it into a jar. And done.

The bad news: there’s about a 3 second line between caramelized and burnt so badly you can’t eat it. Melting and caramelizing the sugar is “the hard part” and a candy thermometer won’t help you.

So let’s get ready. This is a recipe where you can’t be measuring ingredients as you go. It literally happens too fast for that.

Tools needed:

enamelled cast iron 6-8 quart pot
non-reactive stirring spoon – like firm silicone – or a metal/silicone whisk
glass or ceramic container with a lid – if I don’t have any fancy mason or ball jars, I like to re-use spaghetti sauce jars as they are just the right size

Ingredients needed for roughly 24 oz (4 cups) of caramel sauce

2 cups granulated sugar
12 Tbsp salted butter, cut into 1 Tbsp slices
1 cup heavy cream

Alright, you’re ready to get started.

Step 1: pour the 2 cups of sugar into the bone dry enamelled cooking pot. Enamel is a non-reactive surface known to distribute heat most evenly across the large bottom of the pot so that no section of the sugar burns before the others; it’s also a non-reactive surface, so it won’t introduce metal elements or flavoring into your caramel like stainless steel, copper, and direct cast iron will. And you need it to be a pot rather than simply a large skillet because the later steps will result in the mixture bubbling and foaming up, and this will overspill a skillet.

Step 2: place the pot with sugar on medium heat. WARNING: do not use higher than medium or your sugar will burn before it’s all melted, and you’ll have to dump the whole pot and start over. Now, every stove is different AND your local environment (heat and humidity) will affect the stove setting that achieves your desired level of burnt. On my electric, glass-topped stove in Winter Park, FL, exactly medium achieves my preferred dark caramel and one notch from medium towards low achieves my family’s preferred standard medium caramel.

Step 3: to stir or not to stir while the sugar metls. This is a bit controversial because you’ll see the majority of online recipes insist that you not stir. In my experience, not stirring leads to a darker brown, slightly bitter caramel sauce; so if you like that, don’t stir. Most of my friends prefer the lighter to medium, milky sweet caramel sauce, and I find that minimal stirring makes this easier to achieve. And when I say minimal, I mean that once every 90-120 seconds, I use my spoon to “turn over” the sugar so that the melted layer is on top and the dry sugar that hasn’t gotten heat is on the bottom. That’s what I mean by stirring.

And as you can see, I prefer a spoon to a whisk. Like the pot, the spoon is an heirloom and is part of the history of making this sauce and others like it. Also, my experiences with whisks and a pot full of sugar have been meh, so I stick with the spoon that works.

When I see it color and bubble through the sugar layer, that’s when I scoop the sugar over to put the dry on the bottom to get melted.

Step 4: use your nose. Your nose is your best guage to the level of burnt you desire. If this is your first time trying homemade caramel, I encourage you to let it go to the too burnt to use state so that you can teach your nose “when it’s time” to stop burning the sugar.

Step 5: add the knobs of butter.Turn off the heat, but leave the pot on the burner. Drop in the knobs of butter and let them start bubbling and foaming up the sauce. Once it starts dropping back down, stir like crazy to really get the butter incorporated into the sugar sauce. This entire steps takes maybe 25-30 seconds.

Make sure you have these two ingredients cut and measured and ready to go at your fingertips.

Step 6: add the cream. Move the pot off of the burner and pour in the cold cream. Once again, the sauce will bubble and foam up. And once again, as it starts to drop back, stir until all of the cream is incorporated and the sauce turns a uniform color and is mostl shiny on top.

It’s one thing to say it will bubble and foam up, and another to see it before it happens to you for the first time.

Step 7: let the sauce sit for a few minutes just to cool off a bit. Since you’ll be using a glass jar or glass or ceramic bowl to store the sauce, you can pour it in hot, but it’s still a good idea to cool a bit, just in case there are any flaws in the container that might make it break. There’s nothing sadder than 4 cups of freshly made caramel sauce dripping down the front of your cabinets and pooling on the floor.

This is my personal preferred dark caramel sauce. I’ll try to remember to take some pics of my standard/medium caramel sauce before I give it away.

Step 8: run scalding hot water in your cooking pot immediately. This will melt any remaining sticky sugar and make cleaning your pot for the next batch of caramel sauce quick and easy. Do the same for your stirring spoon or whisk as well.

Ways to Use 4 Cups of Caramel Sauce:

Popcorn topping
Coffee add-in
Dessert topping
Oatmeal topping (in place of things like brown sugar, maple syrup)
Ham glaze
Pancake/Waffle topping
Fruit dip
Fondue – in place of chocolate

Children

Even Old Girls Can Do the M in STEAM!

Posted on August 16, 2020October 14, 2021 by singingaboutcooking

Thirteen years ago (2017), I applied to an MBA program. Now at that time, I already had 3 bachelor degrees, 1 masters degree, and 1 PhD. I was accepted without reservation, but one of the reviewers who knew my dad from a social club told him “she’ll have trouble with the math.”

What?

You see, that reviewer, who funnily enough specialized in the leadership classes of the program, assumed that 2 bachelors degrees in music (yep, not a single digit of math there) and a PhD that was 1/3 logic (nope, no math fundaments there) couldn’t possibly include basic, much less analytical mathematics.

I’d already taken and earned As in graduate level statistics not once but twice by that point. And I was going to have trouble with the math.

I get it. He – yes, it was a he – saw the department names “English,” “Music,” Linguistics,” and “Composition and Rhetoric” and heard only the “school of humanities.” Ahhhh, the old division of arts and sciences, right? Well, I’m the one with a foot in each, successful professionally – yep, paid in both arts and sciences!

Fast forward 13 years, and I’m 9 months into being the CFO for a 3-branch real estate brokerage in a luxury-heavy market. I move millions of dollars each month. And am held accountable for it weekly and monthly through an official review processes. Had a great conversation with our CPA Friday afternoon; she loves me.

I had this moment today – Sunday, August 16, 2020 – where I had a bit of a “take that, jackass” moment. You see, a colleague had asked for help in one of our online forums with explaining a financial outcome in a way the boss would understand.

I hopped on a call, checked the math formulas, matched them up with the company policies, and viola, explanation. And among all of that made a friend, mostly because I offered to figure it out with her, not because I knew the answer.

I spent an hour talking through financials without even having a statement in front of me – mine or hers – for reference.

All of this after being the very first CFO to pass the new CFO approval process for my region – the third most profitable region in the world for my company. All because I could explain the logic behind every single number and math output of the financial statements. Where I move millions of dollars each month.

She’ll have trouble with the math.

I already had 5 degrees. I’d submitted transcripts showing 2 As in statistics already. So what’s left is “she.”

It’s not often that I pay attention to sexism against me. I’ll fight you if I see/hear you apply it to someone else, but I just don’t care enough when it’s directed at me. And then I think of what it might have cost me.

It’s not often that I pay attention to sexism in my dad’s favor. But that’s what happened. I was given a “pass” because my dad is a graduate of the same school, an all-male school when he and the reviewer attended back in the day. I was a “good risk” because I had earned credentials, and I had existing connections with the school.

Women in STEM graphic from flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/pennstatelive/28240669948

Everyday Musings, leadership

Toxic Trait Revealed by Quarantine Life: How One Dream Unlocked My Self-Deception

Posted on April 25, 2020 by singingaboutcooking

I’ve been having increasing challenges keeping my cool and reacting in my traditional, normal rationale (if sometimes dispassionate) way to regular and surprise life – noticeably and almost measurably for the past two weeks.

It got so bad that I had to ask for a perspective check this week on how sensitive I was being, as I’d taken a colleague’s question as an attack – that I wasn’t doing my job, or at least that I wasn’t doing it well enough. And this was from a colleague whom I know to be my (second) biggest fan.

And then last night I had a dream that was dark and kept spinning out even after I woke up.

The Dream

I was at a night-time church service. I was sitting with the worship leaders I’d worked with, served with, led worship with for over 9 years. It’s a liturgical service, with the same basic pattern every week.

The pastor leans over to me and asks me to go up to the lectern ahead of my part and do one of the scripture readings. I agree. No worries. I can’t remember the last time an in-service change or “mistake” actually felt like a problem.

I get to the lectern and pick up a hand-held, corded microphone, lean down and extend my finger to mark the beginning of the scripture reading so I can track what I’m doing…

And I can’t read the words. The entire Bible is in wingdings.

I look back at what the bulletin says is the scripture, to make sure I’ve got it right and to hope that the bulletin has the scripture printed (sometimes it does), and the scripture there is also in wingdings. The rest of the bulletin is in regular English, but the verses are in wingdings.

I squint, thinking it’s my eyes. I search my brain for what I remember of the passage, even if I have to paraphrase, and nothing comes to mind. I pray that a hymn verse or some anthem excerpt comes to mind so that I might at least sing a portion of the message.

Nothing.

I have nothing original, nothing scripted to provide support or direction or even a starting point.

And no one helps. No one offers to help. The entire worship team sits silent and waiting behind me. And the congregations sits silent and waiting in front of me.

And in that moment it feels like even God has left me to flounder.

Some Context

I grew up in the high German Lutheran liturgical church of the ELCA and rose to worship leadership quickly after college; I even dabbled in theology classes with the thought of becoming an Associate in Ministry (AIM).

I have served various liturgical churches as a professional singer and worship leader for over 20 years: Lutheran, Anglican, Presbyterian, Episcopal, and Methodist. Only the Catholics have never hired me ;-).

I’ve coached ordained ministers and career church musicians through the nuances of different liturgical services when they’ve filled in for another liturgical denomination.

I’ve trained churches through liturgical worship revisions and re-launches.

Knowing, following, understanding, working within the pattern of worship is kind of my thing. It’s what I would have specialized in as an AIM – worship practice and leadership.

Even beyond that, I think of the times when my choir director calls me as I’m literally driving to a Sunday morning service to tell me that the guest soloist isn’t going to be there and now I’m going to be singing a solo – in a style that doesn’t suit me terribly well – that I’ve never sung or practiced even as a lark – and doing so in about 30 minutes with maybe one run-through. Even that doesn’t phase me.

I’ve completely rewritten children’s sermons on the way to church because something happened on that drive that was even more powerful than what I had planned.

You might say vamping for God is something I do quite well.

So upon my first wake-up at 5:30 am, I turned on my peppermint diffuser, heated up my flax seed pillow, tucked back in with my pillow weighting down my eyes, and went back to sleep – with the objective of turning off those awful thoughts so I could wake up with a clear(er) mind.

And it worked – three hours later I woke to snuggle with Shadow and try hard not to be mad at myself for oversleeping my planned early morning hike before the rain.

Dream Reflection

For me to be so completely stifled, silenced even, is so far out of character, out of reality that as I woke the first time, the film in my mind kept going.

It’s been a really long time – probably a decade or so – since a dream kept going. It’s happened before, yes.

And it was the second wake-up – beginning with such disappointment in myself for not meeting a self-imposed commitment – that started my epiphany.

So here’s where I wound up – in case you’re ready to jump to another blog or head back to Facebook for a baby goat video – the change in interaction, in daily communication with certain people, the loss of feedback in visual/physical methods, these are affecting my personal ability to know that what I’m doing is

enough
valued
productive
helping others

And that last one is the real kicker. Between my 99S (DISC) and responsible, relator, and connectedness strengths (3 of my top 5 CliftonStrengths), that helping others and that what I’m doing is valued by others (useful to) are what’s critical to my ability to keep calm, prioritize and re-prioritize efficiently, to know and have confidence in what I’m doing and that I’m doing it well.

These are the foundational elements of my measure of my own self-worth, self-value. I *need* to know that what I do matters. It never needs to be helpful to me. It’s always about how helpful it is to others. That 99S is a doozy!

You see, the messages I do get are at cross purposes

you have to do this by x date – and “you” is specifically named me by name or by job title
you have to give yourself grace if you can’t get it all done
you still have to meet all of the deadlines, without fail
and you have to take care of yourself
you have to delegate some of this stuff to others
your leverage options are full and you don’t get any more (at least right now)

So the short is that I’m expected – expressly so by others and by extension myself – to do everything and more. And I simply can’t. Yes, there is a point where all things are NOT possible. There are literally not enough minutes in a day even when I work a “normal” 10-hour day.

Add to that the fact that my co-leaders have equally over-full plates. That’s where the not asking comes into play. Why on earth would it be logical for me to add to their plate? To burden them with my job when it’s my responsibility to figure out how to get it all done. They are at least equally as burdened as I am.

And therein lies the opportunity (because by biggest fan hates the word “problem”):

For decades, I’ve been the person who does and usually can say yes and get it done, even when I don’t have to be that person. It’s a natural part of my responsible strength.

I need to become the person who says “not now” and sometimes “no.”

I need to become the person who says “let me figure out how to make that happen” rather than simply assuming the assignment/request myself.

It feels mean. It feels like I’m letting others – and by extension myself – down. It feels like I’m not doing my job – or worse, dumping my job on someone else’s plate. That last is a HUGE piece of the mindset, much bigger than most believe.

And yet it is normal, it is human, and it is necessary. It’s called leverage, and for the person who’s spent decades being the leverage, it’s impossibly hard on a basic level.

How I Connected the The Dream and the Epiphany

So you’re wondering how I got from a wingding Bible to quarantine self-doubt, yeah? It’s a six (or seven) degrees of separation thing, I think:

In a context where I know and feel complete confidence because of my long-term knowledge, experience, and expertise

Asked and agreed to jump in the way I have a million times before – no worries

Failing completely at that last minute request – and especially in a way another expertise (linguistics) would normally have supported me

Recognizing that I’m in a new job not quite 5 full months AND a new role – from leverage to leadership; the job has woefully inadequate training and a high degree of inconsistency across the corporation in how it’s perceived and used

Not having the knowledge and experience long enough to feel confident on a foundational level – as a leader in “normal” times

Feeling not recognized and valued as a leader by others in leadership – specifically being treated as not important in the big discussions and decisions, only in a data entry role

Being deprived of the feedback, conversations necessary for me to know where I and the work I’m doing stand – knowing that I’m succeeding, somehow, in a role where there are very few standards or benchmarks

Is it any wonder I’m suffering from self-doubt in my abilities, in my achievement of success and standards, in my leadership attempts. Heck, I don’t even really know where I’m actually failing because I’m not getting enough of that communication either.

Is it at least 50% my fault? Yes. I have a responsibility to ask for the communication, the feedback, the evaluation, and the help that I need, especially since I’m well conditioned to project a ridiculously high degree of capability.

It’s at least another 20% my fault for, by default, not answering the question “what can I do for you today” with an answer other than “I have what I need from you.” And I give kudos to both my leadership and my staff for asking this. It’s my fault for not thinking about the answer more carefully, or even anticipating it and having things to leverage appropriately.

Oh who am I kidding? It’s 100% my fault for not speaking up and telling the people I’ve trusted to lead me and coach me that I need them to see these things and coach me on them. Push me to acknowledge that I’m doing it again. Stand with me to make better choices. I have to teach them my weaknesses, my challenges, if I’m ever to expect them to help me.

And therein lies the conflict: teaching them this and laying an expectation on them to help me fix my problem is that “burden” that chains the toxic habit to me.

Probably the most important “general” lesson – mantra – that I can take from the quarantine experience is goes something like this:

Bad habits are learned in good times while good habits are learned in bad times.

It’s not quite the right expression of the saying; it is as close as I can get as I’m wrapping up this post. And I’ve written it on my bathroom mirror because there is no day that goes by without me seeing myself in that mirror.

NOTE: these are thoughts in progress, a journey.

Books this reflection has prompted me to reach for include

Leadership and Self-Deception by The Arbinger Institute
Dare to Lead by Brene Brown
The One Thing by Jay Papasan and Garry Keller – in particular the the 7 Circles exercise

Love Life

Confession of Wedding Dress Terror

Posted on January 31, 2020January 12, 2020 by singingaboutcooking

My Wedding Dress — Pretty sure this is THE ONE for me…eeeeek!

So in early January 2011, I had my first invitation ever to go wedding dress shopping with a friend. Woohoo! Fabulous! Can’t wait! Isn’t this every woman’s dream? To go wedding dress shopping? To imagine and dream of that one perfect day when she is a true princess, looks gorgeous no matter what.

Yeah, right.

Just a few minutes in the first shop, and I wanted out. While my friend tried on dresses (and I wrangled one of her two children), I walked around and looked at the dresses. At least, I tried. So many styles, colors, embellishments. It’s truly overwhelming…even more so for a woman (uhum, me) who hates shopping for clothes.

Danielle's Wedding Dress — Nope, this is not the dress she picked for her vow renewal, though it was one of my favorites on her!

Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE to dress up and look good and be really stunning on occasion as well. But when faced with the pressure…heck, just the thought of the pressure…of finding that one perfect dress that will do all the right things and not even think of the wrong things for that one perfect dream day, well shit. That is definitely enough to turn this old, hardened realist into a coward.

And then the truth was forced out of me. I’d never even tried on a wedding dress. You know, like that episode of Friends where Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe all go get a $99 sale dress from Kleinfeld’s (when it was still on 5th Avenue in Bay Ridge Brooklyn) and just hang around the apartment all day, pretending.

And then I made the mistake of posting said admission on FaceBook, which netted me a slew of commented, texted, and even called-in astonishments and dares.

And I can’t resist a dare.

So at the last store…David’s Bridal…yes, I tried on a dress. And damned if it isn’t THE ONE. Simple, fitted, with just a bit of bead embellishment on the top and straps. And best of all, it fit in my exact dress size, not the few sizes up that wedding apparel seems to run. And the bonus: under $500 regular price. Huh, not bad for a girl who started the day terrified of doing more than offering my opinion on the dresses my friend was trying on.

NOTE: I originally wrote this post on January 6, 2011 though I didn’t post it until January 31, 2020.

Being Healthy, Everyday Musings, God Loves Me!

Re-Discovering Self-Care

Posted on January 12, 2020January 12, 2020 by singingaboutcooking

I started a new job six weeks ago. An amazing job. A dream job. An exciting job.

And in classic CeCe fashion, I’ve given it everything and more: 10 hour days, nights in front of the tv, weekends. I truly do love it and am enjoying the many ways I get to help others through this job.

Yet no matter how much I love it, it still wears me out…every day.

So last week when my co-leader caught me rubbing my eyes just after lunch, he started a campaign to send me home early, take some time off. Even if I hadn’t been working long days, I’d certainly accomplished well more than expected in a short time and had earned some extra self-care time.

So I left at noon on Friday only to realize I had absolutely no plan for self care. And it didn’t take me long to remember that when that question came up in my interviews, my co-leader had noticed…and noted…that I didn’t have a good answer for what I do for fun (self care).

So I gave myself permission to treat myself to some things I used to do regularly, a long time ago, that had somehow fallen off of my schedule:

massage – for the gift of touch, of meditation, of being present and focusing on the real needs of my physical body, of my acceptance that I can’t will away the tired when my body really needs rest
my favorite coffee – for the uniqueness, the spice, the warmth, the moment of earthiness with the first sip
my favorite handmade soap/shampoo/lotion store – for the indulgence, the expense, the luxury, and the promise of a bath rarely prepared
my favorite clothing store – for the self-expression through clothes that I’ve discovered only with age and acceptance of my body and my inner weird
my favorite rock – for the gift of stability, a place to sit, the elevation above the ground so I can see farther and more clearly whatever I’m looking at
my favorite church – for the blessing of my God, the comfort of a familiar place to worship, the words of prayer and absolution, the message I need to hear whether I like it or not, the safe place to cry it out in frustration, pleading, or thanksgiving
cooking – for myself to make intentional choices about how I feed my body and mind, for others to care for them
blogging – for sharing how my brain works things out, not always problems – more things that intrigue me, challenge me, seem important even when I don’t yet know why

Things I didn’t do that might also become part of my self care:

read a book or listen to a podcast – a devotion, a memoir, I think of this as something soul-feeding rather than mind-feeding, though certainly I’m happy for it to do both
hike a trail or waterfall – the mountains call to me, so that’s where I instinctively head for quiet time; and I wasn’t in the mountains this weekend
paddle a dragon boat on the lake (coming in spring)
meditate – something I’m trying out with a group starting 1/14

I have so many questions about what and how, all because I got out of the habit:

What do you do for self care that I might add to my try it out list?
What are you looking to achieve with self care?
What hasn’t worked for you, and why do you think it didn’t work?

I’d love to read what your self-care experiences have been.

Everyday Musings, leadership

2020 Bucket List

Posted on January 8, 2020January 7, 2020 by singingaboutcooking

I’m a #theonething #the1thing follower. I read the book annually. I listen to the weekly podcast. It heads my 411.

I use the #411to plan success.

So what do I want to achieve in 2020? Here’s my #2020BucketList – and these are in importance order:

find a church and faith community where I can continue growing
celebrate my 45th birthday at Harry Potter World 10/31/2020 – with my nieces and anyone else who wants to join!
add 5 states/countries to my list of places visited (get a map to start tracking and planning this; get a National Parks Passport): Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Rhode Island, and Spain – this covers 2 vacations this year
go on one big hike each month (join a hiking group/meetup?)
get my real estate license (for referrals, y’all!)
write to the people who live in my house in Homer, AK to start working on buying my house
pay off planned debt reduction (part of larger financial plan)
save/grow at least $15K (part of larger financial plan)
enjoy a full year’s subscription to Sparkle Hustle Grow – and the books and growth training included in that!
design and get my fireweed tattoo

PS: my bucket list for work is different. How? It goes on a Growth Plan as my focus for each month – ways to ensure that I am constantly in a system review and quality improvement mindset.

Oh, and the best part: I give you permission to hold me accountable. To text me and ask where I am in accomplishing one or more of these goals. I mean, you read this far, so deserve that permission. Make it count!